A whole year...

My little Man,

You are ONE! Seems crazy that this day felt like it would never be here.... as a parent I think you feel like you will have your tiny baby forever, then suddenly, your baby is so big!

You Malakai, are by far the best one year old I have ever met! You are a delight! You may have to share that title if you ever have siblings though!

I feel like this photo shows your character so well. You are bright, loud, grubby, full of excitement, active, curious and sooooo adventurous. 

You have two teeth still, curly blonde hair, and the deepest blue eyes. You weigh 22lbs, and are still very tall! You love to say 'oh wow' and 'ball' - you are obsessed with light switches, door handles and lids. You need to put lids where they belong, and try out all the handles... You know the sign for "milk" and use it ALL the time... you point too, at EVERYTHING!

You have a sweeter gentle side too. I love your cuddles, and the way you  melt into my shoulder when you're tired.  Your sweet open-mouthed kisses, your giggles, and especially the way you drift to sleep while you're staring right at me. 

You had your first birthday cake a few days ago when we gathered with some of your favourite people, you had a great time in your birthday sandpit too! It was a very special day, one I will remember always. 

Romans 8:32 - He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?

Our son, this year has taught us both SO much but most of all our hearts have experienced an incredible love that we've never felt before! God has given us a child....YOU! You are the greatest gift we have ever received and by God's great goodness he has used that love to show me just a TINY bit of how much God must have loved his Son, Jesus! But Romans 8:32 says that God didn't hold on to His Son, as precious as he was. God willingly sent Jesus to his death to save you and me. 

I hope this verse shows you that, as much as your parents love you, you are MORE valuable to your Heavenly Father, who sent his Son to die to save YOU! And for that fact I am praising God right now! He is a faithful and loving God and you can put your life in His hands and he will never let you down, because he has saved you!

We love you with our whole hearts!!! Happy birthday, sweet boy.

Momma and Daddy

Six Months Old!

Romans 15:13 - May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.

Hi Squish,

Oh my goodness, you are half a year BIG! I can not believe how fast this came round! They say time flies when you are having fun, its so true.

So - let me tell you just how much fun we have been up to in the last 4 months.

You started doing all sorts of crazy things that take lots of skill!
- You roll over,
- Sit up,
- EAT EAT EAT
- Laugh so much!
- You talk to yourself a lot, and to us - Lots of Mamma and Dadda sounds!
- You are unbelievably funny, and you make every single day a JOY!


You are weighing in at just under 21 lbs, and no one quite believes us when we say your'e only 6 months old! You are very very tall!

In the time since our last letter to you, you have had lots of firsts! Your first solid food, first Christmas, first snow, first time meeting Great Granddad - (you loved him - of course!) - and so many more!

We can't believe how much you change day to day... the way you learn things all by yourself, such a testimony to Gods incredible design, being parents has made us more and more aware of how amazing God is... He never ceases to amaze us. We go the the Neonatal specialist so they can make sure you're developing well after all the troubles during pregnancy, and in true testimony to Gods healing power, you are doing better than fine - developing perfectly, we will never accept it as anything short of a miracle and a blessing! God is good. I am so looking forward to writing your 1 year update, just because I know that I will be even more blown away by God's goodness to us...it is ever increasing!

Psalms 145:9 - The LORD is good to all, And His mercies are over all His works.

We love you more with each passing day little man! We pray daily that you will grow to know the Lord in all His goodness! Because NOTHING will bring you greater JOY!!

Love always,
Mamma & Daddy

Two Months Old!

Little Fella,

Two Months!!! When did that happen?
You are 13lb 9oz of pure funny bone! You crack us up daily with your little smiles and giggles! You respond to us more and more, you concentrate so hard on everything in sight!

You are growing out of clothes almost as soon as you've grown into them! I feel like you grow overnight.... its non stop and its a dream to watch you thrive so much!

You started coming to work with us this month - since you were about 6 weeks! You love all the people, and love hanging out in the wrap while Mama works! A major highlight of the month was your Ouma and Oupa visiting from Zimbabwe. They stayed for the whole month and it was so special to see them with you! They doted on you and did a great job helping us to look after you! You especially loved Oupas big shakes and Ouma took an impressive amount of photos of you! We hope that they will have a chance to see you again one day soon!
While they were here you had your first beach holiday - we spent a week in Abersoch, Wales, with the entire family - You didn't really have a clue where you were, but we like to think you enjoyed it! Who doesn't like the sea side after all? Your BIG cousins Sarah and Timmy were there with us and they lavished you with kisses and endless cuddles! You enjoyed bathing with them too! (Yes, you still LOVE to bath!)

James 1:17 - Every good and perfect gift is from above...

We had the opportunity to have you dedicated (blessed) in church this month. It was a very special day, and we felt so grateful that we had that opportunity to thank God for you in front of our church family, and to tell them of how wonderful God is to safely bring you to us! We also prayed that we would, with Gods help, be able to raise you well :)

You are still a delightfully happy baby that gives us no trouble at all. You are laid back and just seem to go with the flow! Nothing seems to phase you much at all.

You are gaining weight like a champ - probably due to your endless eating! You are a healthy little chunk! We still have to get your head measured every two weeks to keep an eye on that fluid on your left ventricle - but so far so good! :)

My favorite things about being a Mama this month have been, seeing you make other people happy, and seeing you become a very smiley boy! I love giving you raspberries, and I absolutely love it when you laugh so hard in your sleep that your whole body shakes. I love the way you nuzzle my neck when you're sleepy! So cute!

You are growing a second chin, and you now have some chubb in those cheeks of yours! Keep growing little squidgelet, Mama Loves you!

Your First Month!

Little Squishy Man!

You are one month old! The days turned into weeks and just flew by! I cant believe we have been blessed with you - you are simply wonderful! And you are growing fast!

Psalms 127:3 - 'Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him!'

How beautifully accurate that is - You are a blessing and reward! After all our worries while you were still in my tummy, we are all the more aware of how much of a gift each day is. Each one is a blessing that we will never take for granted.... I have enjoyed every moment of being your Mama!
Its been such an adventure already! You made us parents for the first time and its been so much crazy fun!  I have loved watching you grow this month. You are more and more awake - you smile in your sleep ALL the time - and you laugh in your sleep too! I need to get this on video!

You love to bath, its your absolute favorite thing to do, well, that and eat! You eat and eat and eat - much like your dad! Last week you weighed in at 9lbs 5oz! You have had so many visitors and you love being passed around for cuddles. :)

You pull some absolutely cracking faces...some great scowls! I think you take after your Daddy in this respect, he is forever pulling faces!

You are such a great baby for us too - you eat well, rarely cry, sleep soundly & you are very sociable :) We so enjoy unwrapping the gift that is Malakai, slowly getting to know your character and the little boy that God made you to be!

I cant wait to see what the next month has in store for us! I only wish time would slow down! Loving all these moments!

My favorite part of being your mum so far - all the little froggy snuggles, you scrunch into a teeny little ball on my chest, right near my heart! I love the way you sleep with your little mouth open. I love your newborn smell, and all that downy hair. I treasure our middle-of-the-night feeds! Daddy loves your little yawn... he turns to mush every time!

Keep growing little man of mine! I love you!

A New Creation!

Dear Malakai Daniel,

Today you were born. It seems funny that you have been alive for so long and yet there is a big difference between eagerly awaiting you when you are tucked away in your momma's tummy and when we can hold you in our arms! Your momma and your daddy wanted to tell you a little bit about how we felt today, so here goes.

Daddy:

Hey kid! This day was such an amazing day in so many ways but the first thing I want you to know about it is how I felt the first time I saw you take your first breathe. I'm sure your momma will tell you lots about what it was like for her, but just before you arrived, we were very nervous. We were in an operating theatre, with no guarantee that you would be able to be born any time soon, or whether the doctors would need to rescue you. So then, when you appeared and were handed to us by the doctor, it was a combination of shock, disbelief, bewilderment and excitement. You were a very grey colour and you hadn't started to breathe at this point. Though we knew that this was normal, we were worried; and when the doctors said they wanted to take you to the resuscitation area, we were panicking even more! All this was within the first 20 seconds of you appearing from inside your mum, and the midwife whisked you off, through a door, leaving us feeling bewildered and scared. All the doctors kept telling us that this happens all the time, and some babies can take over a minute to start breathing by themselves, but we didn't know what to think. After so many worries about your health throughout the pregnancy, we had no idea if your little heart would be able to cope doing it's job, or if any of the markers we'd been told about may point to a problem that could mean your life could be in danger before it even begins.

So I was stood next to your momma, seeing the worry on her face as she is desperate to hear your cries from the other side of the door.

Then we heard the most joyful scream we had ever heard in our lives. I left your momma for a few minutes, walked through the door and right in front of me I saw this...

You were filling your little lungs and yelling for all you were worth as the tears filled my eyes. The doctor was telling me that you were fine, and that you had started breathing all by yourself a few seconds after you left the room, but I wasn't listening. All I felt was this.

Thank you, LORD, for bringing our son to us!

There was so much relief felt by your momma and I, knowing that God had graciously answered our prayers. We knew that all we wanted was for you to be alive, and if you were healthy as well then that would be a bonus. However we also knew that God is sovereign over both life and death. God never promised to answer our prayers, but he always promises to hear them. And by his grace, here you are.

Remember, my son, that every day that you have on this Earth is a gift from God, the giver of Life, and therefore we all have a responsibility to give God the glory for that life that he has given us.

I thank God for every moment that we have with you, and EVEN MORE than that, I thank Him for Jesus' sacrifice on the cross. Jesus knows what it is like to be a baby, like you are now. He knows what it is like to be hungry, to cry, to feel love. He has experienced every aspect of human life that you will go through, and He was willing to suffer the most horrible death imaginable to save you.

For Christ died for sins, once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. 1 Peter 3:18

Momma:

My Lil man, 

Today was your birthday. After a long labour, you came into this world in a way that was so dramatic. Every second was a real test of faith, much like my pregnancy had been. I had been so focussed and determined to get you out safely, but all the while, I knew that it would only be by God's grace and goodness that I would get to hold you alive! 

First time I laid eyes on you!

Through tears I finally saw you as you were placed on my chest... all I could see was how grey you looked. I stroked your little thigh. So tiny and perfect, but you looked so lifeless and I was terrified. I don't recall much of what was being said, but I do remember asking over and over if you were ok. The Dr said she wanted you taken away, and I was scared. You still hadn't made a sound or taken a breath. As they whisked you away I cried and cried. Soon everyone was commenting that they could hear your screams, but I couldn't hear you. I made daddy go and see you. Not long after, he came back, crying and telling me you were perfect, and ALIVE! He kept hugging me and crying, he was so happy that you were ok. I sent him back to be with you, and that's when he returned with you in his arms. The single most breathtaking sight of my life, seeing him holding you, you were screaming! 

You were given to me again, but this time you were far from lifeless...you grabbed my finger and clung to it. I will never forget the relief I felt, seeing you so full of colour, and so alert! I was so grateful to God. I never wanted to let you go again. Looking at you, everything felt calm.... This verse flooded me:

"Be still and know, that I am God!" Psalm 46:10

All the way up to your birth, daddy and I had talked about every scenario. How we would respond if you were not OK. If you would need heart surgery. If you would need to be taken to NICU. If you didn't survive birth. So many possibilities to think through following all your scans... We wanted to be prepared to praise God, whatever the outcome. We also wanted to make the most of every minute we would have with you. But in preparing myself for all the worst case scenarios, I hadn't prepared myself for you being perfect. I was astounded, and so grateful to God. I have told your daddy that I wouldn't undo all the scans and worry for anything, because through all the unknowns, I have learnt so much and grown so much. I have been greatly humbled.

We are so very undeserving of you, Malakai. You are truly a gift from God. We pray daily that we can parent you in a way that is God honouring, and we pray that your life will always be a testimony to God's amazing grace. You have already been used to strengthen our faith and trust in God, as we have had to lean on Him more than ever in our journey to meeting you! I look forward to many many more years of leaning on God as we end the journey of meeting you, and begin the journey of raising you! Its gonna be an adventure!

All my love, 

Mamma xx